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The attitude, opinions, and acts described in The Glossary of Perversion are not the opinions or feelings of Get Offended.com or it's staff, blame the assholes who submitted them. Also if you are an idiot, moron, or have an IQ less than 30 please don't read on. We don't want to get blamed for some stupid shit trying any of the following on anyone else. Consider yourself warned.

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B A - B - C - D - E - F - G - H - I - J - K - L - M - N - O - P - Q - R - S - T - U - V - W - X - Y - Z - Thesaurus - TOP

Baby Rodeo (see also "Buckin' Bronco", "Butt Rodeo", "Fat Chick Rodeo", "Rodeo Clown", "Rodeo Sex") - (for the ladies) When riding your partner who's about to blow his load, give some good pounding strokes. When he's at the point of no return, scream out 'Let's make a baby!'. See how long you can hold on, while he tries to throw you off of his erupting cock. One night stands should only be considered for the more advanced rider. - Cheshire Kat, California

Baby Sparrow - A sexual technique where a man ejaculates into his partner's mouth, then starts to flap his arms and chirp as his partner slowly regurgitates the load back into his own eagerly awaiting mouth. - The P-Two's, Cleveland

Back of the Volkswagen - Doing it in a very uncomfortable place. "What, like the back of a Volkswagen?". - Kevin S

Backdoor Blumpkin - You need a really dirty ass-eating chick for this one. While urinating, a dirty whore sneaks up from behind and jams her mouth in your asshole and gives you the wettest, sloppiest rimjob available. - Hawko's Class

Backdoor Johnny (aka, ³Assassin², ³John W*lkes Booth²) - Dress up like a janitor to gain access to a seedy motel room. Hide out in the bathroom and wait for some pathetic john to call in the local hooker. After he pays for her, but before they start, run out of the bathroom and hit the john with a lead pipe while yelling, ³sic semper tyrannis!² Fuck the whore, steal the johnıs wallet and car, and make a dashing escape. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Backdraft - When a woman farts during anal sex. - Pimpsta866

Backpack - One person gives the partner an upside-down piggy back ride. The rider then proceeds to eat the asshole of the other while they are walked around the room and worn like a backpack. Very useful because the individual receiving the "Backpack" is still able to go about their daily business while being anally pleasured. - DaHouse, Arizona

Backyard Barbecue - The Canadian term for eating out ass. Used by strippers during their lesbian shows. - DJ D, New Hampshire

Badussy - When a girl's belly runs into her pussy.

Baked Alaska - When you are hitting it anal and you cum in her ass. She then shits on your stomach. - Bubba W

Ball State Teaser (aka "Waste Management") - After a night of partying off campus, come back to a girl's room who you hooked up with. She starts fondling your cock but stops and starts, working you into a frenzy of blue balls. Just tell her to sit back, watch, and learn. You proceed to masturbate in front of her, and after shooting it on your stomach tell that hoe to lick it up so you don't have to waste any tissues or paper towels. It's strictly used to cut down on trash which helps the environment.

Balloon Knot - Another name for the asshole, because it looks like the inside of a tied knot in a balloon. - Opie & Anthony

Baltimore Beatdown - When you are banging a chick, you tear off her arms and legs, and so she thus becomes one giant boner. That is, her torso is now an extension of your boner. For added effect, begin punching the chick's torso now propped up on your bone, until she pukes. Thus, it is as though the gigantic boner is coming. - The Grundile Gang, DC

Banging the Drum - When you jab your heavily lubed ding-a-ling into a female's ear attempting to tap her ear drum (it helps to be musically inclined to add a rhythmic element), until you blow your hot sauce, rupturing her eardrum for the grand finale. - Troll, Prock, and Joe, Shocker University, Baton Rouge

Banus (see also "Taint", "Scranus", "Choad", "Chode") - The area between the balls and anus. - Elliott, Chicago

Barb Wire - Two crossed fingers in the pink, two crossed fingers in the stink. - Will B, MA

Barbara B*sh - Fucking a 93 year old grandmother. - Col. Von Noodle, Brooklyn

Barbecue Grill - As you do a girl doggystyle, you yell out "It's time for a barbecue!" and then you light the back of her hair on fire. - Mike, Ohio

Baseball Rules - (see also "First Base", "Second Base", "Leading Off Second", "Third Base", "Rounding Third", "Reaching Home", and "Home Run") - Dating status of (by popular recognition) a couple where their level of success on each date is based on Baseball's succession of the bases. The rules are as follows:
1) First Base - The couple have partaken in making out, and possibly light petting. In some areas, visual confirmation of boobs is also included in a single to "First Base".
2) Second Base - The couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs and heavy petting including but not limited to fingering the girl, and stroking the guy. No orgasms generally happen at "Second Base".
3) Leading Off Second - The couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs and heavy petting including but not limited to fingering the girl, and stroking the guy. One (or both) of the couple have reached orgasm directly due to the heavy petting of "Second Base".
4) Third Base - The couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs, heavy petting including but not limited to fingering of the girl, and the stroking of the guy, and oral stimulation of one or both of the couple. No orgasms generally occur because of the activity occurring at "Third Base".
5) Rounding Third - The couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs, heavy petting including but not limited to fingering of the girl, and the stroking of the guy, and oral stimulation of one or both of the couple. One (or both) of the couple have reached orgasm directly due to the Oral Sex of "Third Base".
6) Reaching Home - The couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs, heavy petting including but not limited to fingering of the girl & the stroking of the guy, Oral stimulation of one or both of the couple (orgasm optional), and penetration. In other words, they did it all, ending in sex. All acts have to take place in the same date for it to be considered "Reaching Home".
7) Home Run - The couple have partaken in fucking without effort (without foreplay) on a date. This is considered a "Home Run" because they didn't have to worry about getting from "First Base" to "Second" and from "Second" to "Third" and so on. They stepped to the plate and pretty much scored.

Basted Wick - When a woman forgets she has a tampon in and you pack it deep with a thrust. Then cum all over it. - Terri, Eagle River

Bat Wings - When you are sitting down for an extended period of time and have to get up but your nuts are stuck to the inside of your thighs. When you try to get them unstuck without using your hands, your sack pulls with your thighs creating "Bat Wings". - Eddie D, Virginia

Bathroom Bandit - That guy who, no matter where he is or what he is doing, will urinate on any surface he comes in contact with, provided that he is even remotely intoxicated (also known for bathroom shenanigans such as placing parking cones in toilets and plungers on the wall) - T$, Lynchburg

Bathroom Brice - When peeing in the pee trough at a sporting event, a man leans over to the patron next to him and states, "Hey, buddy, niiiiiiiiice cock!" - Eric, Los Angeles

Bavarian Fire Hose (aka "Der Bayerische Feuerschlauch", inspired by SNL skit) - First, throw your non-consenting partner to the ground. Then urinate on them while chanting, ³House on fire! House on fire! Put it out! Put it out!² (for added fun, do it in German: ³Unterbringen Sie in Brand! Unterbringen Sie in Brand! Stellen Sie es aus! Stellen Sie es aus!²) Then force the individual to drink antifreeze until they pass out. When they awake, make sure they are in excruciating pain with a size-nine poop shoot. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Bearded Lady - This is kinda like the "Dirty Sanchez", except you do it doggystyle then get shit all over your unit, followed by wiping it across her face to make it look like a beard. - krandkon

Beaver Splitter - When a man forcefully engages in the act of sex, mildly speaking, therefore tearing up the interior of a female's vagina, rendering the female unconscious for about 25 seconds. She later has no idea of what happened. - Benjamin G, Pennsylvania

Beef Curtains - A pair of oversized pussy lips. - Beaner, Pennsylvania

Beef Jerky Slurpy - Blowing a load into a constipated ass and then trying to slurp it out with a straw. A variation on "Felching". - DM

Beef Stew - After having your way with a girl, while she is on her back, shit on her chest and piss on it, but don't forget to stir it around so it looks like "Beef Stew". - Jimmy, Massachusetts

Beef Stroganoff - Masturbation referring to beating your "meat". - Tony, Michigan

Beetle - Thumb in the stink, index finger in the pink so those fingers look like a beetle's pincher.

Beetle Click - While doggystyle, palm your girl's ass in each hand. Poke both your thumbs up her ass. Click your thumbnails together inside her.

Behymen - A virgin ass, similar to the female's hymen. Someone who has yet to be anally penetrated is said to "Have their Behyman intact." - Justin, Caliphornia

Belgian Smoker - During the morning after a drunken romp, pretend to cook breakfast but instead, light a Belgian waffle on fire, throw it in a pan of grease, throw the pan into her bed, run like hell. Childish, pointless, yet intriguing. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Belly Fuck - When you get a really really fat chick and fuck her in her bellybutton.

Benedict Arn*ld (aka "Traitor") - This is good when a girl isn't quite down with anal sex... After a night of trying to convince your girl to have anal sex with you, you wait 'til she falls asleep, tie her hands and feet to the bed and shove your dick in her ass. Kinda like stabbing her in the back, hence the name. - Ed M

Berdodd - The act of using your small penis to fuck a girl in the belly button.

Beverly Hills Whiffer - This move is restricted to those women who think they're God's gift to the world. Find a woman of the above description. Take her home and start doggystyling her. When you're about to blow, corkscrew two fingers into her ass, scraping as much shit as you can from her. Pull out your fingers, reach around her head to stick one finger in each nostril. Pull her head back so she can see you while you yell "So, you think your shit don't stink now ?!"

BG Blanket - Collect the pubes from all the chicks you've banged until you have enough to make a small blanket. After you are done banging your victim, proceed to wrap them up in the pube blanket, and seal it tight with your own ejaculate. - JIGGAMAN

Bianco Dip (aka "Mudslide") - Start by catching a girl shitting on a toilet. Shove her off and sniff her head (or something retarded to distract her while your buddy picks her shit out of the toilet). You then persuade her to sleep with you. When you finally accomplish this (which most people who are reading this probably never will) you grab the poop from your buddy and SMOOSH it all over her cootch. Then, you bang her like a Nicaraguan crack fiend. - DJ LUNCHTABLE

BIF - A girl with a bag up front so large, the term "FUPA" just doesn't do it justice. BIF stands for "Butt in Front". - DP AMN

Big Kahuna (aka "Glazed Ham") - When approaching orgasm during anal, you pull out, place a pineapple ring around her brown eye and a cherry in the hole. Then glaze the ham - all ready for Easter dinner!

Big Top - Next time you're at a carnival, drag out the Fat Lady and a couple of midgets. Take them to the roof of the tallest building in the city. Then have that fat ass shave each kickstand completely bald. When she gets done... roll the nude little bastards in a ball and position them on each side of you. Stand up straight and start spitting up in the air while yelling "I'm a cock.... I'm a cock". Congratulations you are now the biggest dick in town. Before getting off the roof, FIST the fatty in the can and chuck the midgets off head first. This trick is slightly more fun while wearing a red rubber nose. - Nathan K, Canada

Bill Buckner - While receiving head standing up, the girl cuts off your balls and rolls them through your legs. - Mikey M, Brooklyn

Bird of Prey - When a girl gives you a blow job and you shoot your load in her mouth, she swallows it, you fall asleep, she then wakes you up and regurgitates the load into your mouth. - John B, South Carolina

Bird Watcher - A girl who accepts cum on her face, and in her mouth, and swallows. Think about someone looking up at a flock of birds, and ... all over the face. The "swallows" part comes from the bird called a "swallow". Cumming on a birdwatcher's face is also known as "Taking a trip to San Juan Capistrano". (That's where the swallows nest every year). - Talent Scout, Washington

Bizmark (aka "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - When a girl is giving you head, right before you blow your load, you pull it out of her mouth and blow it on her face. After you blow your load on her face, you punch her in the nose with your free hand. Then you take your hand and smear the blood and semen together to make the "BizMark". - Pete J, Indiana

Black-Eyed Susan - While receiving oral sex, right before ejaculation, a man punches the lucky lady in the eye then continues to blow his load upon sight of impact. - James P, New York

Black Man's Kryptonite - Simply White Women. When you put this stuff out in a crowd, there is always a black man waiting to get his 'nose' dirty. - Brandito, Missouri

Black-Lite-Hoe (see also "Strobe-Lite-Hoe") - That girl you meet at the club who looks good inside (under the black light) but outside on the patio, in the normal light, you realize how ugly she is. - Justin, Caliphornia

Blarney Stone - As a girl (could be a guy...) is sucking your dick, one proceeds to pass a kidney stone into her mouth. - James6Plus 3 0 1

Blast Zone - While fucking a girl from behind, replace you dick with a stick of dynamite and then proceed to light. - Mike T, Brooklyn

Blender - A version of the "Shocker": finger a girl with two fingers, then switch to a reverse shocker (two in the stink, one in the pink). Then switch to the real shocker. (kudos to squanto for the name of this one). - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Blitzkrieg - While sexually plundering the asshole of a German slut, scream "Blitzkrieg" right before you unload, which will signal your gang of eleven friends waiting in the hall with tazers to rush in and shock the bitch simultaneously, causing her to tense up and flail about giving you the greatest unloading of your life. Schnell! - FoodBank

BLOM - When a girl is blowing a guy and goes too far down. She'll puke on his dick. - The Phynn

Bloody Jihad - Have forceful sex with a girl, blow on her, then beat the shit out of her until she is bleeding. Follow by screaming, "FUCK IRAQ!" - James, New York

Bloody Mary - When a drunk guy is going down on a girl and, without even realizing it, after he's done, he realizes Mary was very Bloody.

Bloody Snow Cone - When you get head from a girl, spooge on her face, then punch her in the nose.

Bloody Sundae - When you are getting a blowjob from your partner, cum on her face and then punch her in the nose. - Andrew, New York

Bloody Wheelbarrow - Your doing a girl doggystyle and then you take her arms out from underneath her so her nose hits the floor. Then you take her arms and use them as the wheelbarrow handles. - The Crew, New Jersey

Blow Fish - When you give a girl oral sex, she queefs in your mouth and you cheeks puff out like a blow fish.

Blow Job - When a male receives oral sex.

Blue Balls - 1) Term used to describe being brought to the point of climax and never getting any release... a common side-effect of first dates. - Travis, Ohio
2) (aka "Boner Killer") Medical condition caused by your girlfriend getting you aroused then stopping short. Some studies show, actually being struck in the testicles can actually cause this condition too. A common side-effect of this form of contraction is known as "Grapefruit Nuts" where the testicles swell up the size of grapefruits and turn colors. - Justin, Caliphornia

Blue Crush - Use this only on a girl you have a crush on, but keeps turning you down. Have a party at your place, and toward the end of the night, take her to a secluded area of your apartment. Have a cement brick in hand. If performed correctly, she will wake up with a sore ass and a blue contusion on her head, hence your crush is now Blue. - Powerz

Blue Ov*l Certified - After a young women has given up her anal virginity to a group of men she has been "Blue Ov*l Certified".

Blue Wings - The act of going down on a dead chick. Thus you have received your "Blue Wings". - Anjew D, Illinois

Blumpkin (see also "Grumpkin") - Receiving oral sex while sitting on the toilet.
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Blumpkin Red Badge of Courage - Going down on a girl on the toilet while she's on her period. - Sick Johnny, Chicago

Blumpkinette - Going down on a girl while she is on the toilet. - T-Bone, Ohio

Blumple Stiltskin - Receiving oral sex while hovering above the toilet on crutches. - DP AMN

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Gotta Glossary Submission for Glossary Of Perversion.com? Email your terms to getoffended@aol.com. All submissions become property of Get Offended.com, if you do not wish to receive credit for your submission here on our site or in any other media, please note so in your submission.

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The attitude, opinions, and acts described in The Glossary of Perversion are not the opinions or feelings of Get Offended.com or it's staff, blame the assholes who submitted them. Also if you are an idiot, moron, or have an IQ less than 30 please don't read on. We don't want to get blamed for some stupid shit trying any of the following on anyone else. Consider yourself warned.