Glossary of Perversion D

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The terms in the following Glossary are for amusement only and should in no way, under any circumstances, carried out or attempted on anyone or anything!
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Dancing Bear - A large, scary turd that stands up out of the water. - Mitch, South Carolina

Danger Wank - The art of tossing off and while you are about to come, shouting downstairs to your mom or wife / family member to come up to see you, then you have to finish off and clear up before you are caught and scolded. - Baztheman, England

Danza Slap (see also "Tony D*nza") - When a girl goes down on you and after you blow your load, you pull it out and smack her in the face with your erect cock. You loudly exclaim, "Who's the boss!" - Tom, MI

Davey Cr*ckett - 1) A sexual maneuver in which you slip a muscle relaxer into your partner's snizzpod, and slide your head in, thus wearing your partner's now-relaxed snatch-fur as a coonskin cap. - BDogg, Pennsylvania
2) When a woman's snatch is so hairy that it covers her crotch then goes up her asscrack like the tail of a coonskin cap. - Chris H/, New York

David & Goliath - Bang a chick considerably bigger than yourself, in a standing position. Right after you drop your load, crack her in the head with a rock. - Jamii T

David C*pperfield - 1) You're poking a chick. As you're pushing in, the other end of your cock mysteriously appears out of her ear.... and her mouth... and her ass. Presto! - Mr. Blue, Minnesota
2) When you fuck a chick from behind and spit on her back so she thinks you came. Then when she turns around to give you a kiss, you blow the load in her face.

David H*sselhoff (aka "Knight Rider") - Bangin' a chick in the back seat of a Camaro (or any White Trash Muscle Car). - Mr. Blue, Minnesota

DDF (aka "Distance Distortion Factor", "Deception") - The factor or ratio at which a girl (or guy) looks attractive at a distance but as he / she grows nearer, you realize their true ugliness. - Quinn, UND

Deak (aka "Houdini", "Phantom", "Sneak Attack", "Spit Trick") - When you are nailing a girl from behind, deak her out by spitting on her back to make her think you jizzed. When she turns around, launch your load in her face...a nice deak. - Matt & Julien

Decepticon (aka "DDF", "Distance Distortion Factor") - A female (or male) who you think looks good when your about 20 feet away, but when you get closer you realize she / he is ugly as hell. - Icuffm2, Illinois

Decker - This involves two guys and one girl. The girl gives one guy head, and the other guy puts it in her ass. While this is happening, the two guys play cards and exchange high fives. - John and Ray, Miami

Deep Throat - A term used to describe the ability to take a penis beyond the realms of the mouth and insert it directly down your throat. First popularized by Linda L*velace. Now personified by...

Defacational Facial - Act of shitting all over your partner's face. - Craig, New Jersey

Demolition Man - Have an orgy with two or more women (no men unless that¹s your thing). Fuck each into a coma so that they sit (preferably) in a semiconscious state on the bed. Make sure that you have eaten large quantities of fiberous food the last couple of days. After lining up the victims and bending over in front of them, knock¹em down with a furious bowl ejection. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Depth Charge (aka "U-571") - When a person in an outdoor toilet climbs as high as possible on the walls and unloads, hopefully, into the urinal below... If chili or beer was involved and the toilet is splattered , you scream "You sank my battleship!" - Mike B, New York

Der Bayerische Feuerschlauch (aka "Bavarian Fire Hose", inspired by an SNL skit) - First, throw your non-consenting partner to the ground. Then urinate on them while chanting, ³House on fire! House on fire! Put it out! Put it out!² (for added fun, do it in German: ³Unterbringen Sie in Brand! Unterbringen Sie in Brand! Stellen Sie es aus! Stellen Sie es aus!²) Then force the individual to drink anti-freeze until they pass out. When they awake, make sure they are in excruciating pain with a size-nine poop shoot. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Deranged Rabbit - Sticking your ball bag out your pants while keeping your cock inside and pulling your front pockets out to look like ears. Hopping around helps the effect. - Mud, NY

Detachable Penis - In the dark while you are fucking your woman, instead of using your penis to penetrate her cunt, use a banana or cucumber, or something that resembles a penis. Make unusual sexual "grunts" Proceed to fall out of the bed, leaving the penis-like object inside of her. If done right, she will go into a panic thinking your penis fell off. - Kirk B., Indiana

Dexter - Same as a "Tony D*nza" except you dish out repeated blows to the head whilst yelling "YOU ARE STEUUUUUPID! YOU ARE STEUUUUPID! AND DON'T FORGET, YOU ARE STEUUUUPID!!" in a cartoon Dexter voice. - Rich D.

Dickiedoo - When the belly hangs farther then the dickie-do. - Mauna, Nebraska

Dicksicle - Put a condom in the freezer filled with water all day until it is good and frozen. Then, when banging a girl later that night, right when she is about to climax, jam it into her and watch her eyes pop out of her head. - Jason L.

Dilophosaurus Surprise - When you are giving it to a girl missionary style, and right before you blow your load, you blow a snot rocket in her face. (reference to the Dilophosaurus in J*rassic Park, which spit at people to blind them). - GoLord

Dingle Berry Crunch - Have a hearty bean burrito for lunch. Relieve yourself and wipe minimally. When it's time to bone, ask to have your salad tossed while she pulls your chain from behind. Scream out: "They're Grrrrrrrrreat!" before she gets a face full of babies. - JDAVO, Staten Island

Dinnjob - When you bleach your pubes. - Cuban B, New Jersey

Dirty Black Boy - Same as the "Dirty White Boy," except don't EVER get married, have a coupla' keeds, and on the side screw a white girl - preferably a college girl, they'll do ANYTHING, when Mommy and Daddy's not around! (They're just "experimenting," anyway.) Remember, they'll marry a white guy eventually, and their poon'll stretch back to normal by then. Yo yo yo! - Sick Johnny, Chicago

Dirty Bomb - A sexual act during which the male lays pipe to the female or other male doggystyle and flings a paper plate full of feces (turds), which have been warmed in the microwave for 90 seconds, and smacks the recipient in the back of the head at the point of climax! - Mike C., Indiana

Dirty DeVito - When a Midget is sucking your dick, blow your load in her hair. Using your cum, shave the top of her head so she looks like the Penguin. Then, give her a cane, top hat and some fish. -SM, Connecticut

Dirty Dianna - Sacrificing the "crown jewels", presenting them to your fair maiden and have her wear them to your next black tie event. No jewels can top these at a Royal party! - Mr. Blue, Minnesota

Dirty Gomez (see also "Dirty Sanchez") - Placing your index finger into your anus and painting a mustache on yourself, like the frito bandito- similar to the "Dirty Sanchez" but fun when your lonely. - Bruce L.

Dirty Groucho - It the same as a "Dirty Snachez" but you use your index and middle fingers, when she turns to see why you have fingered her ass you spread them and give her a unibrow and a mustache with them like Groucho Marx. Add thick black glasses for extra points - Johnny, Orange County

Dirty Harry - After banging a girl all day, have her give you a blowjob on her knees. Right before you're ready to shoot your load, pull your ".44 magnum" out of her mouth and say "I know what you're thinking, 'did he fire off all his loads or does he have one left?' With all this excitement I forget myself."....Knowing you got one round of goo in your "handgun" left, ask her "Do you feel lucky punk?" and shoot her in the face with your load while humming the theme song to the cinematic classic. - Mikey M, Brooklyn

Dirty Inch (aka "Taint", "Scranus", "Chode", "Choad", "Grundle", "Nacho") - The short flap of skin located between a man's balls and asshole (women's pussy and asshole). - Nick, West Virginia

Dirty Jose - The homosexual act of making your partner clean your pooh covered member after a hearty bout of anal play.

Dirty Lopez - When a nasty skank (post-sex and / or menstruation) reaches down between her legs, rubs her middle and index finger into her sweaty, vagina / taint and proceeds to wipe the offensive residue, using her best rendition of Zorro, under the nose (in the mustache area) of the unsuspecting sleeping male victim (the one that just gave her a "Donkey Punch"). Variations such as the DL-DS (Dirty Lopez-Dyke Style) are performed on female victims. Ole'! - L. Boogie (a.k.a. Deeza Nutz), Washington DC

Dirty Mexican - While fucking your partner in the ass you punch him / her in the back of the head just before bustin' dat nut. - Mike & Lucas, Florida

Dirty Mohinder - When you are fucking a hindu in her hairy ass, you yell out "Eat a Cow" so she turns around, then you pull your dick out and stab her on the forehead with your poo-dick leaving a brown dot between her eyes. - R9T, California

Dirty Mutumbo - Like a "Dirty Sanchez", but warpaint instead of a mustache.

Dirty Navajo - After fucking a girl in the ass, proceed wiping the shit on your dick off in thick lines under her eyes, thus creating a "Dirty Navajo". - JCB, Massachusetts

Dirty Sachmo - The act of having dirty balls, ie. smelly, sweaty, poon off a chick.

Dirty Sanchez - During doggystyle sex, the male inserts his finger into his partner's anus. He then proceeds to smear the fecal matter onto his partner's upper lip to create a mustache made of poo.
2) After doggystyle sex, turn her around and stick your dick in her mouth. The fecal matter that was on the tip of your dick will now form a nice brown mustache above her lips. - Adam K
3) When a man is having anal sex with a woman doggystyle, then he pulls out his feces covered pecker and rubs it on the woman's top lip, giving her a "Dirty Sanchez". - Justin
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Dirty Sangria - Same as "Dirty Sanchez" but instead of using her ass, use her poontang after she has just had her period for a red mustache. - Gabe A., Colorado

Dirty Snowman - Like the "Dirty Sanchez" but after cumming in her ass, give her a cum and shit goatie. - Mr. Bones, NC

Dirty Tscherny - (see also "Dirty Sanchez") - (The opposite of "Dirty Sanchez"). Your doing a chick doggystyle, and you stick your finger in her ass and then give yourself a shit mustache. - Andy & Dan's House of Pain

Dirty Vincelli - (aka "Vince C*rter") You hook up with one of your best friend's ex-girlfriends. When you get the chance you jam as much of your arm up her love hole as you possibly can, giving you the appearance of Vince C*rter of the Toronto R*ptors when he dunked the ball and put his whole arm in the hoop and hung there in the NBA dunk contest. - NECRO, Freeport L.I.

Dirty Walrus - When you hold your partner by the ears and force their mouth around your cornhole and shit until it come out of their nose. - Rod, Anchorage

Dirty White Boy - 1) Every night, pick up a broad, take her out, buy her drinks, spend all your money, drop her off, don't get any, and go home drunk with blue balls. Repeat 364 more times a year. - Sick Johnny, Chicago
2) Every night, drive around in your SUV and find a nice white girl and then get her so drunk that she screws you every which way but loose like the whore she really is. Six months to a year later, get engaged, screw all her girlfriends, then finally get married and when she doesn't give it to you anymore because you're TRAPPED, find a minority female, start to screw her, and then make her believe you'd leave your wife for HER! Have FUN! - Sick Johnny, Chicago

DiscoBeat - Having sex at a party in a room that shares a wall with the main room. Proceed to screw in such a way that produces the Thump Thump Thump of the bass at a club. (noise from headboard banging the wall or "The Ram"). - Easyboy, Minnesota

Distance Distortion Factor (aka "DDF", "Deception") - The factor or ratio at which a girl (or guy) looks attractive at a distance but as he/she grows nearer, you realize their ugliness. - Quinn, UND

Divot - While making out with a woman, put your hand down her pants and grab as many pubes as you can. Then pull as many pubes as you can from her bush while yelling "Fore!" - Billy C, Indy

Dixie Cup - This is a very hard one to explain but I'll take a whack at it. When you make a woman lay on her back and stick her ass in the air. While sodomizing her, you pull out and cum all over her asshole. The cum is said to sit on her hole like a "dixie cup" effect. Then you push her ass towards her face and let the cum run off of her asshole between her pussy lips and into her mouth. - Justin

Dizzy G*llespie (see also "Louis Armstr*ng") - When your ass is being eaten / licked and you fart in their mouth, forcing the person's cheeks to bulge out like the great trumpet player's. - Greg S, New Jersey

Dog in the Bathtub (see also "Giving a Cat a Bath") - While having sex, trying to stuff your balls in your partner's asshole. It proves to be as difficult as keeping a dog in the bathtub. - Todd, Pennsylvania

Doggy Bag (aka "Chowder Bowl") - The act of getting drunk and going down on a girl only to throw up in her box and leave it for the next dumb ass to find. - Freakee329

Doggystyle - When the female is on all fours and the male enters her from behind, similar to they way dogs cohort.

Doggy Surprise - If you are taking your girl doggystyle and you are ready for the ejaculation, take your dick out and spit on her back. Then she will think that you are ready and she will turn around for you and probably smile. At that point you blast your load all over that smiling face. - Nijntje, Netherlands

Doing The Horner (aka "MickyLicking") - The art of lickin' another man's spunk out of ya wife's cunt. - Baztheman, England

Doing the Laundry - Pound away in the back nine until things get shitty. Then pull it out and stick it in her washing machine until it's clean. - J, Ohio

Dolphin - When you're doin' a chick doggystyle in the box you pull out and try to put it in her ass, not wanting it anal, she bends her head around to look at you and expresses her displeasure by going "eh-eh, eh-eh" much like a dolphin sounds. - DJ D., Virginia

Don J*hnson (see also "Mr. T", "Kojak", "Chewbacca") - Term used to describe the rough state of a stubbly pussy. - Sebastian Q.

Donkey Kong - This is when you tie a bitch up, throw a barrel at her asshole boyfriend and then fuck her up the ass! Feel free to let loose and make the coin "cha ching" arcade sound and pound your chest like a gorilla! Cut the bitch if she gives you any trouble. You're a gorilla for Christ's sake. - Brian, Pennsylvania

Donkey Punch - (don't recommend trying this one in any circumstance) During doggystyle sex, the male punches his partner in the back of thier head right before he climaxes. The reciever then tenses up from the blow giving the male a better orgasm.
2) When someone is giving you a knob job, they come up for air right as you're getting ready to hose them. Punch them in the face, shove their head down and yell, "you're not done yet!" - Alex, Louisiana
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Donkey-style (see also "Doggystyle" and "Gentleman-style") - Fucking her right in the "ass".

Doogie H*wser MD - The act of taking a shit that hurts so bad you need a Doctor.

Double Bass - A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's Tongue with the other. The position is similar to that used when playing a double bass instrument, but the sound produced is slightly different.

Double Bagger - 1) This is for when you're banging a fat, ugly bitch outdoors. Put a bag over her head and one over yours also. Just in case the bag on her head blows off. - Mikey M, Brooklyn
2) This is for when you are banging a nasty piece of ass, you must cover her head with two grocery bags... just in case one rips. - Carrie H., Indiana

Double Dragon (see also "Split Pissonality", "PEUM") - Post sex urination where you get a double stream out of one peehole.

Double Hiemlich - When the "Lucky Pierre" in a threeway gives his or her partners hand jobs at the same time and they both spit up on him or her. - Jeremy

Doughnut - When you're doin' a chick in the ass...she kinda folds in half and licks your asshole (tosses your salad). - Tonawanda Sr High

Dr. Evil - This consists of screwing Heather Gr*ham doggystyle and as she is about to climax yelling, "The world is mine!" and then shoving a globe in her ass. - Brenda

Dr. Mario - While performing gentleman's style (anal), lift up her legs and walk her around in a wheelbarrow fashion.

Dr. Pepper - In order to do this your girl must be out, we suggest slipping her a roofie or some E. After fucking her all night prop her up so that both her holes are exposed. While she is propped up you proceed to pee in her ass and take a shit in her pussy. - Carpas XIII

Dracula - Eat a girl's pussy while they are on their period, suck out the blood and drink. - Shawn, Oklahoma

Dragon (aka "Angry Dragon") - When a girl is giving you head and you cum in her mouth. When she is about to swallow, give her a karate chop to the neck, forcing the semen out her nose, like flames from a dragon. - Erik, New York

Dragon Bubbler (aka "Angry Dragon") - When a girl is giving you head and you cum in her mouth. When she is about to swallow, give her a karate chop to the neck, forcing the semen out her nose, like flames from a dragon.

Drilling for Oil - Pushin' a girl's knees behind her ears, and pounding her balloon knot in a downward motion. - Cousin PJ, Brooklyn

Drop the Chalupa - When you are fucking a girl from behind, you shit in a sock and hit her in the back of the head with it. - Brian, Cincinnati

Drown the Clown (see also "Wet Biscuit", "Butter the Toast", "Soggy Cracker") - Circle Jerk onto a Gingerbread clown, the last to cum eats the clown. - Brad, Florida

Drowning the Slippery Otter - Sticking your whole hand in your partner's pussy or ass. - Biz Dot, PEI Canada

Drowning Victim - While getting a hummer, just before climax, hold a girl's head down on your cock and watch her squirm as you blow a load down her throat. Not to be done if you expect a repeat performance. - Hightower, MI

Dry Docking - Turn off the water supply to the toilet, flush it a few times until all the water is gone, then take a shit and leave it sitting there unflushable. - Justin, SLO

Dry Fucking (see also "Dry Humping") - The act of having sex with your clothes on. - FSA-MARC-V-33

Dry Humping (see also "Dry Fucking") - The act of having sex with your clothes on. - FSA-MARC-V-33

Duck Butter - 1) Another term for Sperm. - Alex, Iowa
2) Nut Sweat that gets nice ang gooey after being heated up. - Kyle, Michigan

Duck Butter Juice - The remains left all around your penis the next day after having sex. - Chris O, Florida

Dumb Question - When you say something stupid right about the same time the girl is ready for your love. Usually followed after a "Hey, wanna try" - Chris, Washington

Dumpkin (see also "Blumpkin", "Grumpkin") - When a girl slobs the knob while the guy is takin' a shit on the pot. - Ryan, California

Dutch Treat (aka "Gamblin' and Losin'") - The unexpected result of a "Dutch Oven" gone bad. - BDogg, Pennsylvania

Dutch Oven (see also "Turkish Prison") - While a girl is going down on you, you blow ass and pull the covers over her head - Zerb

DVDA - Four guys and one girl. An acronym for double vaginal double anal. - Jeff K., California

DVDADO - Six guys and one girl. An acronym for double vaginal double anal double oral. - Jeff K., California

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