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The attitude, opinions, and acts described in The Glossary of Perversion are not the opinions or feelings of Get Offended.com or it's staff, blame the assholes who submitted them. Also if you are an idiot, moron, or have an IQ less than 30 please don't read on. We don't want to get blamed for some stupid shit trying any of the following on anyone else. Consider yourself warned.

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F A - B - C - D - E - F - G - H - I - J - K - L - M - N - O - P - Q - R - S - T - U - V - W - X - Y - Z - Thesaurus - TOP

Face Fuck - When a bitch is being picky about giving you head, so you forcibly stuff your cock into her face repeatedly until she puts your rod in her mouth and sucks your cock until you're satisfied. - Students of Maryvale High

Facial - Getting blasted in the face with jizz. - Chris A, Connecticut

Fahdunkadunk (see also "Fladunk") - When one is "slapped" with a cock. - Chris H

Fake Out - You start the ground work by threatening your bitch with a "Donkey Punch". (Now we all know the point of the "Donkey Punch", it is pleasurable, but the tenseness of the snatch only lasts for a brief moment then the bitch is out like a light and possibly injured.) Back to the "Fake Out"... start with the threat, while you are partaking in intimate behavior or simply just pounding the hell out her (from behind), start telling to get ready for the "Donkey" you then proceed to "whiff" punches at the back of her head. DO NOT CONNECT, or you have just performed the "Donkey Punch". This keeps her in fear that you will connect. She is tense, uncomfortable, and shaking like a dog shitting peach pits. If done correctly it is like being with a virgin! - MJM III, Pennsylvania

Famous Economist - After taking a laxitive, you go to a public restroom and take a watery shit. You do not flush the toilet, instead you take a twenty dollar bill and drop it over the shit. Leave, but wait outside to see who goes for the money and for a handful of shit. - Reuben Ramos, Texas

Fanny Batter (aka "Cunt Butter") - Female lubricant / discharge. - Mitch, South Carolina

Farge - The space between your nutsack and your right leg. ("Gnord" is the space on the left). - Mike R, North Carolina

Fast and the Furious - When a girl is so hot, you cum prematurely, you just take your hand.. scoop it up.. and slap her with it.. then leave. - Jason, San Diego

Fat Chick Rodeo (see also "Baby Rodeo", "Buckin' Bronco", "Butt Rodeo", "Rodeo Clown", "Rodeo Sex") - Do a little role playing having a skinny male dress up as a cowboy, get a buddy to hide in the closet with a video camera, right before you bust your nut (doggystyle works the best) have your buddy bust out of the closet video taping the whole thing, smack the fatty in the ass, throw one hand in the air, grab some hair, and see how long you can hold on while your buddy videotapes the whole thing. - andeporter, Pennsylvania

Fat Guy in a Little Coat - 1) Trying to sit on the can with a boner. - 1114 SoFo
2) When your dick is too big for the girl's box. - Milton W, Georgia

Fat Lip - If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labia lips will swell. A la, the fat lip.

Fat Tucker (aka "Chern and Burn", "Chernock", "Turd Ferguson") - While in the 69 position you give your partner oral pleasure to the point where they climax. Right when they reach their highest point of orgasm, you shit all over their face. - Deuce D

FDR - Right before you're about to blow a load, give her two charlie horses, one in each leg. Then, blow it in her eye. This will result in her being incapable of using her legs and squinting in one eye, like FDR. - Robb G, Ohio

Feather Spitter - Biting the pillow so hard that one must spit feathers. - Jason P, Illinois

Felching (see also "Yerming", "Velching") - The act of sucking semen from your partner's butt.

Fetus Reading Light - What you do is strap a Christmas light to the end of your dick and then proceed to do your pregnant chick in her pussy. You have just made a reading light for the fetus. - Rick, Eagle River

Fez - Another name for the Jimmy Hat. Referred to in a St**ly Dan Song..."Ain't never gonna do it without the Fez on". - Mr. Blue, Minnesota

Fidel Castro - Take a shit on the chick's face, rip out some pubes and toss 'em on her grillpiece, and then top it off by having her "smoke your cigar." - Woogie310, Georgia

Finger Fries - While driving in your car with your woman, finger-bang her in the passenger seat, getting her nice and juicy (the thicker, the better). After she has come all over your fingers, stick them out your car window or sunroof to dry. After the pussy juices have successfully dried and glued your fingers together, just peel it off for a tasty treat. - Tony, Minnesota

Finger Puppet - An underage virgin who likes the fingers... - Kriss, California

Fire in the Amazon - Fucking a girl and just before you blow... pull out, light her pubes on fire, and shoot you're load all over it to extinguish the flame. - John H, Ohio

Fire in the Hole - A revenge technique of pre-sex greasing up of your schlong with a mixture of B*ngay and Hot Sauce. - Nook

Fire Fighter - Fuck a hairy chick and before you blow your load, light her pubes on fire and put it out with your cum. - krandkon

Fire Starter - A girl taking five cocks; one in the ass, one in the pussy, one in the mouth and one in each hand. - Stephen C, England

Fire Hydrant - A guy bangs a pregnant chick and her water breaks during the act.

First Base (see also "Baseball Rules", "Second Base", "Leading Off Second", "Third Base", "Rounding Third", "Reaching Home", and "Home Run") - Dating status of (by popular recognition) the couple have partaken in making out, and possibly light petting. In some areas, visual confirmation of boobs is also included in a single to "First Base".

Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.

Fish Fluff (aka "Pussy Fart", "Queef") - To expel gas from the vagina. This is very common after forceful intercourse, when air gets trapped inside the chick's womb. (See "Whoopie Cushion") - Crisco, MN

Fishfuck - The act of sticking a fish in a chick's pussy and continue to fuck her hard. - Students of Maryvale High

Fishhook - When you're doing a chick doggystyle, and you stick your finger in the poop shoot. When she turns her head to see what it was, you pull you're finger out and make it in the shape of a fish hook and hook her cheek like you would catch a fish. - Brandon L.

Fishstick - An easy, skanky broad. - Mike V, New Jersey

Fisting - The act of shoving your whole hand into your partner's hole. Any hole'll do; pussy, ass, mouth, peehole (that one may take a bit more lube, sedatives, and a shoe horn). - Travis, Ohio

Fladunk (see also "Fahdunkadunk") - "Fladunk" is the sound made when you pull your penis out of a chick's mouth, "fla", and then proceed to slap it across her forehead, "dunk". - Dean L, Nevada

Flaming Amazon- Whilst having missionary style sex, just before you jizz, pull out and set her pubes on fire, then proceed to douse the flames with your hose. - Wadtron

Flaming Dragon (aka "Angry Dragon", "White Dragon") - When a girl's giving you head, and you reach orgasm, you grab her by the back of the head and shove you dick into her throat. She gags, and it comes out her nose. (Trust me, it works) - Mike & Beau, Ohio

Flaming Pele - While having sex with a girl, right before you blow your load, you pull out, light her pubes on fire and then jump back and kick her in the cunt to put the flames out. Hence the "Flaming Pele" after the great Brazilian soccer player. - Leighton
2) Considered by Charlie D. to be the original definition and origin of the "Flaming Pele" (thought up at his high school lunch table over half a decade ago while daydreaming about bending over the lunchlady spoon serving yesterday's meatloaf...) This move is common when you're having sex from behind with a young woman and notice that she has ass hairs, you then proceed to light them on fire and kick her in the cunt has hard as humanly possible. If her head happens to hit the headboard (or wall), you scream "GOOOAAALLLL!" and run around the room, just like Pele would do if he was there. (Regarding entry #1... there is clearly no need to light pubic hairs, or for that matter extinguish them.) The woman should remain bloody and ablaze while you do a much deserved victory dance and give high fives to your cheering teammates. - Charlie D., New York

Flaming Serpent - When a man lubes up his cock with any flammable lubricant, lights his cock on fire and proceeds to fuck the girl. Best done from behind so that the girl doesn't run away. - Big C

Flashlight Fucking - The art of using a flashlight to view only the genitals while having sex with another partner who is considerably ugly; therefore one would only want to see her genitals. - Students of Maryvale High

Flemish Pressure Cooker - A variation on the "Dutch Oven" which, as we all know, is ³whenever you fart while humping, pull the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement ceases.² This time, fart intentionally. Then, pull the sheet over her head but also keep farting on her face until she stops moving. When she ceases her struggle, continue to hump away. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Flesh Watch - You first ask someone if they have the time. If the answer is no, you grab your schlong and fold it across your wrist, and say it's ok I'll just check my flesh watch. - Dugan R., Connecticut

Fletching - Fletching is the practice of sticking a tube up your partner's ass and having a gerbil (or some other small furry woodland creature) crawl up the tube and into your partner's anus. - M&M, Virginia

Flock of Seagulls - Don't bang or jerkoff for a week straight. Then when you're catching head from a girl, shoot your monster load in her hair and style it the same way the 80's band Flock of Seagulls front man Mike Score so boldly did. - Mikey M, Brooklyn

Flogging the Dolphin - When you proceed to masturbate after an extended amount of time and the load is so massive that it comes out with enough force to make your penis seem to explode as a dolphin's blowhole does. - Matthew R., New York

Flour Method - When you're gonna fuck a fat broad, you throw a bag of flour between her legs and aim for the wetspot! - Keith, Massachusetts

Fluffer - A girl on the set of a Porn Film whose sole job is to keep the actors stimulated. They suck and stroke the actors prior to filming to keep them hard during a series of takes. Often "Fluffer Girls" are the wannabe porn stars trying to make their way through the ranks to Super Star Status within the adult industry. - Travis, Ohio

Fluffernutter - When you cum in a girl's mouth (preferably after a "Blumpkin") and then she gargles your cum into a foam and spits it back into your asshole. Then you proceed to fart it all over her face. - TN, TS, MT, Sr, PT, Pennsylvania

Fly's Eyes - Like the "Deranged Rabbit", but without the pockets being pulled out, looks like a fly's head. - Nathan W., Minnesota

Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote. - Wadtron

Flying Gamahooch (a.k.a. "Swashbuckler") - Starting off with doggystyle-anal sex (a tied up broad and a pirate costume including eyepatch is suggested to complete the effect) slowly remove your penis from the broad's ass and grab the biggest ladder you can see. Make sure the broad's ass is facing you and sticking very high in the air. Mount the ladder as quickly as you can so as not to loose your erection and leap to the chandelier, swing downward (whilst screaming "arr matey") and pray to god in heaven you do not break your penis. - Mike M. & Luke F., Philadelphia

Flying Squirrel - Similar to "Deranged Rabbit" and "Fly's Eyes", except, leave balls inside pants with penis. Take sac skin between two hands and stretch it repeatedly. While doing this yell "flying squirrel, flying squirrel." Best done in a "Sneak Attack". - Ted, Michigan

Footy (aka "Gunt", "FUPA", "Muff-Gut") - The unsightly pouch a female carries right above her pussy. ie "Booty in the Front".

FOP - Fat Over Pussy. When a woman has that fat pouch right over her snatch. - Frank, New York

Forest Fire - While fooling around with a girl, you light her pubes on fire.

Forever T-H-O (see also "T-H-O") - Very very rare. You find a woman whose nipples just tend to stay hard no matter what always giving a tease to those around her. It is even more rare in guys; and once again no one really cares. - X to the A X, West Virginia

Fortune Cookie - After nailing a chick on a one-night job, lodge the condom in her pussy for the next guy to find. - Brett M., Massachusetts

Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)

Fountain of Youth (aka, ³Ponce Deletion²) - Woo and do a jailbait or barely legal chick(s) as many times as possible. Then tie her (them) up and throw her (them) into a geyser to avoid prosecution. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Francis Dr*ke (see also, "Bunkbed Buccaneer", "Walking the Plank", "Shark Feeding", "Rollover", "Herman M*lville", "Getting Ahabed", "Red Beard", "Treasure Chest", "Ahab's Revenge", "Land Lubber") - Achieve "Bunkbed Buccaneer" status, a "Shark Feeding", the "Treasure Ches"t, and the "Red Beard" in one night. You can only become knighted (²Sir² Francis Dr*ke) if you defeat the white whale with "Ahab¹s Revenge". - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Frankenstein's Monster - When you're gettin' head from a girl, and right before you bust a nut, you pull it out of her mouth and shoot it in her eyes. Then you slap her on the back of the head and she sticks her arms out just like Frankenstein's monster! - Wes, Indiana

Freckled Steamer (see also "California Hot Plate", "Cleveland Steamer", "Glass Boat", and "Steamer") - Take a piece of plastic wrap and poke holes in it. Put plastic wrap, over someone's face and shit on it. The "Freckled" variation of the traditional "Steamer" comes from the poked holes. - TJ

Freddy Kr*eger (aka "Wolverine") - Take a nail cutter and cut your fingernails at a sharp angle. Then, with your hand facing upward, close your hand and fist a girl in her cunt as deep as you can. Once you feel like you are deep enough, suddenly open your hand and spread your fingers out inside her in one quick motion, cutting her up with your sharp nails. She should be screaming in pain now and well-lubed up from the bleeding. Finally, rotate your hand quickly so that your palm is facing downward inside her, cutting up the rest of her insides. Her cunt should now be very juicy and wet from all the bleeding. - RM, New York City

French Motor Boat - The act of placing your nuts in a glass of whole milk and then making your girlfriend blow bubbles in it with a straw (whole milk produces better bubbles). - Morty "Snorty" G.

French Onion - After a girl smokes your blue vein cigar, face blast her with your ball snot, scoop it up with a table spoon and then feed it to her. - Dirt, NYC

Fresh Prince - When doing your girl doggystyle and you "arrive", slap her on the ass with your right hand, make a fist with your right thumb extended (as if hitchhiking), point to the right and say "PSHHH".

Fried Egg - A variation of the "Sunny-Side Up", but original in its own right. Start out the way you would the "Sunny-Side Up", fucking a girl doggystyle. When the time arrives, bust your nut on the curve of her back. Now, here comes the tricky part. Immediately following, before she has the chance to move or wipe herself off, produce a can of gasoline from under the bed and douse the sheets. Light a match and the girl becomes a makeshift frying pan. Let fry three minutes, stirring occasionally, when finished let stand one minute. Serve. (Note: You can also pre-douse the sheets before sex, but you may need to find a girl without an active sense of smell to make that work.) - Alex, California

'Frisco Business - Where a "Female" spots a good looking guy, and gets him drunk enough to take her home. He wakes up, looks over and sees her "Dick", and gets the "'Frisco Business".

Fro Nipples - Extremely hairy nipples on a girl; gross! - Students of Maryvale High

Frogging - My roommate in the army and I were discussing weird sexual acts with a Brit officer, and he told us about 'frogging.' It's where you nail a girl in the ass from behind. Shove two fingers in her nostrils to yank her head back, and use the other hand to punch her in the kidneys every 3 - 4 strokes. Supposedly it makes her sphincter tighten up. I'm not sure what effect yanking her head back has, other than making it rough and uncomfortable for her, and I'm not sure what it has to do with frogs, but it's hilarious.

Frosted Loaf - It is when you do a girl up the ass and splooge in her ass. Then the next morning she will scream and call you in and you say, "Hey its a frosted loaf." - Kenny, Eagle River

Frosting the Cake - When you are about to cum, blow a load all over her chest. Then take your dick and evenly spread the jism around the breasts and over the nipples. Then stick some candles on it and start singing "Happy Birthday."

Frothy Walrus - As a man climaxes during a blowjob, he makes a joke, causing the blower to laugh, thus expelling the semen out his or her nose. - Wadtron

Frozen Flagpole - When a chick is so frigid that when a guy goes down on her his tongue gets stuck.

Fruit Roll-Up - When you eat a girl out in her period and then stop and let it dry on your tongue. Then, you peel it off and roll it up. Eat it just like a fruit roll-up! - sobo, Texas

Fuck Trophy - Unwanted / unexpected baby presented to those who don't bother with birth control. - Mitch, South Carolina

Fucked up Riddell - The girl is really good looking except for her face mask, synonyms are "Butterface" and "Butterhead". - Gabriel L., North Carolina

Fuckstick - A slang term used in association with a penis, often used to describe a person who is less than social.

Fudgesicle (aka "Hot Carl") - When you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. (used mostly in gay sex, so we hear)
2) Shit on your hands, smear it on your dick, then have sex with her. - FLINT013

Full Curl - The act of giving a "Dirty Walrus" while holding your partner's nose closed until it comes out of the ears. - Mike, Eagle River

Fumilingus - When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his / her face.

Fumunda Cheese - Referring to the crusty buildup of bacteria, wax, and crusted urine that forms on the underside of the penis. "Fumunda my nuts".

Fupa (aka "Gunt", "PBP") - Acronym for "Front Upper Pussy Area". Defined as the big sack of fat that women have below the stomach and above the pussy. ie, "She has way too much fupage for me." - Nathan W., Minnesota

Fur Ball - Receiving a lodged pubic hair while performing oral sex.

Furry Checkbook - A woman's vagina, especially when used to barter with. (ie. "My mother didn't have any cash to pay her rent so she paid for it with her furry checkbook.") - W. L. Betz, Arkansas

A - B - C - D - E - F - G - H - I - J - K - L - M - N - O - P - Q - R - S - T - U - V - W - X - Y - Z - Thesaurus - TOP

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The attitude, opinions, and acts described in The Glossary of Perversion are not the opinions or feelings of Get Offended.com or it's staff, blame the assholes who submitted them. Also if you are an idiot, moron, or have an IQ less than 30 please don't read on. We don't want to get blamed for some stupid shit trying any of the following on anyone else. Consider yourself warned.