Glossary of Perversion T

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T A - B - C - D - E - F - G - H - I - J - K - L - M - N - O - P - Q - R - S - T - U - V - W - X - Y - Z - Thesaurus - TOP

T-H-O (see also "Forever T-H-O", "SNE") - Titty Hard On. You know like the guys hard-on, only with nipples. Happens mostly when a woman's titties are cold or when she is really horny. Guys get it too but no one really cares. - X to the A X, West Virginia

Tabletime - This is when you are bending someone over a table doggystyle, and right as you are about to cum, in the heat of the moment, you ask them "What time is it?" When they look back at you confused and say, "What?" You then slam their head into the table and say "It's Tabletime Beeeyotch!!!" - Somf23, Ohio

Taco Grande - Having a huge pussy and loving to have the works put in it. - Bradley M

Taint (see also "Scranus", "Dirty Inch", "Chode", "Choad", "Grundel", "Nacho") - The short flap of skin located between a man's balls and asshole (women's pussy and asshole). ie "It taint a nut, it taint an ass..."

Taintflicker (aka "Shock and Awe") - A variation of the "Shocker". Once you have your two in the pink and one firmly planted in the stink, take your ring finger and begin to vigorously flick that "taint". - Robotomus Clam

Tainted Icing - Bust a load all up in a cup and then when serving breakfast to your mate, put it on a cinnamon bun.

Taking Liberties - While your girlfriend is sleeping naked.... you ram your piece as hard as you can into either her pink or ... if lucky .. her stink. - Steve L, New Jersey

Taking the Old Dirt Road (aka "Riding the Hershey Highway") - Partaking in anal sex.

Taking the Poo-Poo Choo-Choo - Blasting your load in a girl's ass. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Talking into the Mic - While getting head from a girl, reach down and grab her hair and say, "Oh yeah baby, talk into that Mic". She resembles a person talking into a microphone. A strictly class move. She'll respect you for it afterwards. - Ryan B, Canada

Tangy Lemonade - Drinking the "Yellow Enema". - Kevin, Eagle River

Taser - A Reverse "Shocker"; ie. "Two in the Stink, One in the Pink" - Mike T

Tea for Two - The act of taking two horny English "birds" and, as they prepare for an innocent lesbian encounter, interrupting with a delivery of a steaming scrotal treat by hovering over them and dropping a sack into each mouth. This can also be accomplished by dropping both "bags" into each of the victim's mouths independently. - L. Boogie, Maryland

Tea with Biscuits - While dropping a "Teabag" or a "Lemon Zinger", you drop tiny turds on the face of the recipient.

Teabag - The act of dropping your testicles onto your partne'rs face and / or mouth

Teargasser - The same as the "Neutron Bomb", except as you head for the punch bowl, you release a long, noxious, tear-jerking gas cloud from your anus. Continue to do so as you pleasure yourself. For maximum effect, eat properly the week before and shit in the punch bowl as you come. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Ted W*lliams (aka "Walt D*sney") - Freeze your crank until it is frozen. Then do a chick with your frozen shaft. It will feel like she is having sex with Ted W*lliams. - Mikey M, Brooklyn

Temperature Taker - While banging a girl in the ass, you ram a thermometer into her ass as well and yell "WHAT'S THE TEMPERATURE?! WHAT'S THE TEMPERATURE!?!" - The Students of Maryvale High

Ten Soldiers and N*xon's Coming - You and 9 other guys circle around the skank, who is naked, lying on her back with her yapper wide open. All 10 guys furiously wack away. Whoever busts a nut directly in her mouth first is the winner. Bonus points go for highest arc, furthest from the hole and closest to the pin. Golfers may enjoy more than others. - Woody, Alabama

Tennessean (aka "Jeremy and Joanne") - Involves 3 guys, 1 girl, and any male farm animal. All cousins. Two guys get the girl in the cooter, while the farm animal of choice butt humps the lone bystander. - RD

Tennessee Cream Cake - Producing the usual stomach pancake batter, but being too lazy to clean it off with conventional facial tissue, towels, or the like. Instead, the "batter" is cleaned off with a downward swipe of the upper portions of the underwear. The batter is then allowed to "bake" over the span of a few hours. The cream cake usually comes out crusty and embedded in the drawers. - Joel, Chicago

Terminator - When you're fuckin' a chick doggystyle and you spit on her back. When she turns around, say "Asta la vista, baby." and cum in both her eyes. The next day her eyes will be red just like the Terminator!

Terrible Prom Date - When your girlfriend is blowing you while you are crouched over her chest, you proceed to take a shit on her boobs. (Note: You must be in a tux and a prom dress.) - Lance Goodthrust, Arkansas

Tex Frex - Shit onto your fingers and flick onto someone's face giving them some smelly freckles. - Prone, London

Texas Belt Buckle - Taking your "boys" (aka "balls" or "Ols*n Twins") and pulling them up over the waist band of your pants... usually done at a mall or nursing home. - Shane, Cincinnati

Texas Foldover - The act of folding a nasty tramp in half, so all three orifices are exposed and easily accessible, and proceeding to ravage your partner's bodily openings in a random order. This maneuver leaves the young lady feeling as if she just had an encounter with "Walker, Texas Ranger" - AB, Ohio

Texas Hotstick - Have a huge dip of tobacco in your mouth while fucking a girl in the ass from behind. Pull out of her ass, spit the tobacco in her asshole so it burns, then keep banging her. - Joe, Boston College

Texas Style - Any sexual act involving feces. - Andrew, Iowa

Texas Tornado - When a guy crosses his first two fingers while banging a chick. - John P, Oregon

Thanksgiving - Just like the holiday, "Thanksgiving" is when you do a girl and then she puts her two big butt cheeks on your face like holiday hams. An "Overcooked Thanksgiving" is similar to this but instead of just putting the cheeks on your head she farts on it too.

Third Base (see also "Baseball Rules", "First Base", "Second Base", "Leading Off Second", "Rounding Third", "Reaching Home", and "Home Run") - Dating status of (by popular recognition) the couple have partaken in making out, playing with boobs, heavy petting including but not limited to fingering of the girl, and the stroking of the guy, and oral stimulation of one or both of the couple. If Orgasm is reached due to the oral sex it is know as "Rounding Third".

Three Finger No Look - When three guys and a girl are in a hot tub and each one takes turns fingering her without ever looking at her, so she doesn't know where it's coming from. - Nathan W, Minnesota

Thelma & Louise - Bang two white trash whores at the same time in the backseat of one of their cars. Then excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and shove the car off of a cliff, rock quarry, etc....... - Kevin S, Virginia

Throne of Lightning - This is done by fucking a girl while you shit in a toilet. When you're going to blow your load, turn her over and dunk her head in the toilet. While she's bobbing for your turd, plummet a river of semen in her ass.

Throwing the Hotdog Across the Warehouse - Describes intercourse with a large, roomy snatch. - Mitch, South Carolina

THUD (or "Thudding") - When a girl's giving you head, right after your blow your load down her throat, you pull out your still hard cock and smack her right between the eyes with it. It makes a nice thudding noise, hence the name. Strictly a class move, and to show her who's boss. - Bigdog, Illinois

Tickler - The "Shocker" with the thumb caressing and "tickling" the pussy. - Tris

Tiger Stripe - When you fuck a girl up the ass and when you pull your cock out it's a little dirty, so you wipe it on her ass, creating a "Tiger's Stripe".

Tijuana Corndog - When you use a tortilla during sex instead of a condom. Following ejaculation, the girl has the option to eat the 'Jersey-style' tortilla. Please note: do not heat the tortilla in the microwave more than ten seconds during use. - Don P, Virginia

Tijuana Ham Salad - For the daring only. You feed your partner a few laxatives, then proceed to fill their rectum with ham salad. Then you attempt to eat only the ham salad out, without getting shit all over yourself. - JJ, Georgia

Time Travel - Fucking around the clock. - Tom M, Washington

Times Square Shuttle - Fucking a girl with your friend and switching from mouth to vagina and vice versa. - Col. Von Noodle, Brooklyn.

Titanic - 1) A girl who is likely to "go down" the first time out.
2) After hours of passionate lovemaking in the pool, DROWN the bitch! - Big Daddy Markowitz

Titbacking - Instead of titty fucking a girl with your face towards hers, titty fuck her to where your back is towards her face. This way she can eat your asshole. - LCG

Titty Fucking - Put your dick between a chick's tits. Have her push her tits together creating a nice tight spot for you to slide your member between until you give her a "Pearl Necklace" or she could finish you off with her mouth. - Joe, Boston

TKO and GO - When you are doing it doggystyle with the girl and are almost at the point of bustin' your load, deliver a punishing blow to the back of her head. After she is knocked out. Leave your load in the middle of her back. After you do your deed, place a one dollar bill in the pool of jizz on her back, get your shit, pack up and go. - Mike J, MA

Toasted Almond - When you're doing a chick on the beach, pull out and dredge your shaft in the sand, then reinsert it with a little extra friction and you're officially giving her a "Toasted Almond". - Dagoboy, New Joisy

Toboggan - You're screwing a chick from behind at the top of the stairs. As you climax, punch her in the back of the skull, knocking her out, grab her arms and ride her down the stairs like you're on a toboggan. - Kaley, Missouri

Toe Fuck - Put your big toe in a woman's vagina and kick away. - Tony, Michigan

Toe Jam - 1) Cum on your girl's toes (or in time of boredom, your own) then let dry. - Derek, Ohio
2) When you take your foot and shove into a girl's pussy, let her cum on it then you take it out wipe it on some bread and eat the bread with her juices on it. - The RatPack, NJ

Toilet Paper Roll - When two guys are fucking a woman on her hands and knees, one in the yapper and one in the snapper or crapper, and the two guys clasp hands and get the gal bouncing between them like how a toilet paper roll can flutter. - Kevin & Mike, Eagle River

Tombstone 69 - While having standing 69 with her upside down, wait till you cheese then exclaim "tombstone" and drop her on her head WWF style. With any luck, she will proceed to expel "angry dragon" style as well because of the impact. Important note: make sure your dick is not in her mouth anymore when you "Tombstone" her.

Tonedog - This is when you make your girlfriend wear go-go boots when you are having sex. - Brian, Pennsylvania

Tony D*nza - 1) (see also "D*nza Slap") You are banging away doggystyle and at the penultimate moment you pull out and yell "Who's the boss?" Shove it in her ass, "Donkey Punch" her, blow your load and say, "Tony D*nza!!!!!". - Wadtron
2) Blasting a girl from behind, you slow down and slap her ass as hard as you can... when she turns to react, you yell, "Who's the Boss".

Top Tanking (aka "Upper Decking") - Take a shit in the back tank of a toilet so whenever there is a flush, the bowl fills with shitty water. - Justin, SLO

Tossing Salad - 1) A person is forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. J*llo, jism, etc, originally a Prison Term, but somehow has crossed over to mainstream as the act of licking ass.
2) The man tosses himself off & cums between the female's arse cheeks & then he sucks the cum out of the arsecheeks. - Gem

Totem Pole - When you make a fist then stick your arm all the way up someone's ass. They'll tighten their ass muscles and break the bones in your arm. - Jill, Julie, and Evan, Massachusetts

Touchdown Jesus - Do a chick in the endzone of the Notre Dame football stadium while wearing a pope hat. Eternal damnation may result. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Toxic Shocker - Insert the two in the pink and the one in the stink, then invert them. The introduction of the dirty elements into the girl's personal area will create an all too familiar "Toxic Shock".

Traitor (aka "Benedict Arn*ld") - This is good when a girl isn't quite down with anal sex... After a night of trying to convince your girl to have anal sex with you, you wait 'til she falls asleep, tie her hands and feet to the bed and shove your dick in her ass, kinda like stabbing her in the back, hence the name. - Ed M

Trashbag Pete - From the Latin "Bagging System" where girls hot enough to fuck with ugly faces, on a scale from 1-5 paper bags: 5 being the ugliest, Trashbag Pete is six and up, only you can't be that hideous unless the rest of your body is fucking horrific, at which point the girl is put in a trashbag, has it tied off, poses however she wishes, and then receives the warning that whatever comes next will either feel really good, or blind her permanently, before he makes a hole wherever and just starts goin' at it.

Traveling Salesman (see also "Suicide Bomber") - Go home with a "Slore" on what you know is a one night stand. Fuck her good a couple of times, go to sleep and when you wake up fuck her again. Soon, she will get in the shower. When this happens take a shit in her bed and make the bed up so that you can't tell. Get the hell out. When she gets out of the shower and notices that you are gone she will think, "Where did he go?? Oh well, he made the bed, what a nice guy..." She will return home the next day after a hard day at work and climb into her bed to find your friendly gift with her toes. - Wadtron

Treasure Chest (see also, "Bunkbed Buccaneer", "Walking the Plank", "Shark Feeding", "Rollover", "Herman M*lville", "Getting Ahabed", "Red Beard", "Ahab's Revenge", "Francis Dr*ke", "Land Lubber") - After a successful boarding, slam your dick between the tits of the unwilling wench and begin pumping. - McWopper, Mr. President, Squanto, Ling-Ling, Wilcro, Big Ju and the rest of the A-team

Tricky Piston - During doggystyle sex, lube up her ass and pussy with a lot of spit and start humping as fast as you can. When you feel you're ready to blow your load, slam it in her ass and pussy back and forth even faster. It looks like an engine piston compressing gas, but it's your jizz. - James, Oregon

Trifecta (aka "Triple Crown of Sex") - In the yapper, the snapper, and the crapper all in the same session. - Smalls, Pennsylvania

Triple Crown of Sex (aka "Trifecta") - In the yapper, the snappe,r and the crapper all in the same session.

Triple Whammy - When both your girlfriend's mom and her sister are both extremely hot... you go into her mom's room at night and get a boner by looking at her, then you head to her sister's quarters and start chockin' it right there...then you quickly head to your girlfriend's room and blow it all over her face...your girlfriend, her mom, and her sister...voila, "The Triple Whammy". - Eric and Robby, IN

Trojan Helmet - Similar in execution to the "Arabian Goggles" but with an added twist. Once you've stretched your scrotum across her face and deposited each nutsack into the appropriate eye socket, simply drape your dick over her nose giving the recipient the profile of the ancient Trojan helmet. - Ernest F

Trollin' for Queers - When a man leaves his zipper down.

Tromboning - When a woman eats your ass while jerking you off. (picture someone playing the trombone) - Deadhappybaby, California

True Love (aka "Yellow Enema") - When your sex partner allows you the ultimate pleasure of peeing in their butthole. - Kevin, Eagle River

Tumbleweed - This must be done while driving in a car with doors. While on the road the driver (male) is receiving head from a woman / man. Once you, the driver, blow your load, you open the passenger door and kick "the blower" out of the car without stopping... making them roll down the road like a tumbleweed. - Jeff K, CA

Tuna Mask - Taking an empty can of tuna fish (tuna in oil, not water) and punch out two holes on each side of the can. Then cut a rubber band and tie each end into each hole. Proceed with placing your newly acquired "mask" over your nose and mouth while placing the rubber band behind your head to keep the mask in place. Then view your favorite porn flick or dirty magazine while inhaling the pungent stench of the mask while also pounding your pud. - Ron, Washington

Tuna Melt - One of the sickest things we have ever received... You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.

Tunnel of Love - Drop a massive deuce in the female's mouth then take a nice long wiz into her nostrils simultaneously. This lucky lady will feel the sensation of a chocalate / Mountain Dew, ice cream float.

Tupperware Party - Occurs when you and few of your best buddies get together and concurrently bang the ever-loving shit out of some hapless broad from all angles. By plugging up her every open orifice, you thereby make her airtight, just like a piece of Tupperware. - Rod L, Barbary Coast

Turd Burglar - (Sick fetish) The love of the fecal matter from your sex partner. It's been known that some worship it. Shrines were even found in some parts of the US. - Students of Maryvale High

Turd Ferguson (aka "Chern and Burn", "Chernock", "Fat Tucker") - While in the 69 position you give your partner oral pleasures to the point where they climax. Right when they reach their highest point of orgasm, you shit all over their face. - Deuce D

Turd Hammer - Another name for the protruding item going into the anal cavity. ie "Hammer the Turd". - Chris, Ohio

Turkey Neck - What occurs out of the stinker from too much anal. - Darren M, Nevada

Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.

Turkey Timer - Push your dick inside out and when you get a boner it pops back out like a "Turkey Timer".

Turkish Linoleum - When you are gettin' a suck job and proceed to pull out just before you bust and release the load evenly over your partner's face. Spread your juices around, leaving no spots untouched, then spread your scrotum tightly over their face as if you were layin' linoleum... let dry for 2 hours... - John H., Michigan

Turkish Prison (see also "Dutch Oven") - While getting a blowjob from a girl, fart and pull the covers over her head. - Ryan C, Connecticut

Twelver - You need to drink a twelve pack of beer to make her look hot. - Dylan

Twinkler - The act of 69-ing a girl and shoving your dick into her mouth hard, then you watch her asshole "twinkle" as she gags.

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